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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 3:30 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.

A review of ‘Zeerembuck’ by Steve Goble

> Here is a review I wrote.  Let me know what you think.>

>> 

     One of the wonderful stories in the current (#9) issue of ‘Flashing Swords’ is sword and sorcery flipped.  Zeerembuk by Steve Goble (a reprinting from 'Clash of Steel 3: Demon' from Carnifex Press) is told from the point of view of a summoned demon with something other than service on his mind.  It seems the summoner made a mistake and what that means for this demon drives the tale as he strides off like a hero to action.  The writing is in a clean visual style with a touch of playfulness in the details, “The demon chewed and spat chain mail...”  I kept thinking I was reading a Ray Harryhausen movie as this is a large demon with scales, but the story is not farcical or silly like a Monty Python sketch, everything is distinct and very visual without being cartoon like.  Descriptions like, “…with a snap and a great splash of water and muck” give clear images to move the story on.  I read with a feeling of delight and ended the story feeling very satisfied.  A very nice illustration by Miquel Santso accompanied the story.  The new editors of Flashing Swords have been adding illustrations to the previous issues (available online) using a variety of artists that complement the stories.  All this for free.  A print version of the issue is also available. Go to Flashing Swords Press on the internet and check out the adventures!

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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crystalwizard
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 3:35 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
I like it. A few nit picky comments:

Instead of one single paragraph, break it into several. It'll make it easier to read. Focus each paragraph on one thought.

Spell check and double check. You've misspelled the artist's name and there may be other things, such as punctuation, you need to adjust. Set your word processor to a large font, then read it over. That way, you don't get distracted with the content.

Adding the url for Flashing Swords after the name of the magazine will help people reading the review to find the website.

Leave out details that don't pertain to the review. The comment about art being added to older stories hasn't got anything to do with the story you are reviewing.

How about revising the review and posting it in a reply to this thread?

Never meddle in the affairs of a wizard unless you are soggy and hard to light!



Managing Editor of Flashing Swords

Visit my art gallery on art wanted
All my books in print

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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 3:42 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Will do.

I know it is late but I think I have the author's name spelled like it is in issue #9.

Steve Goble

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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crystalwizard
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 3:54 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Not author's name, Dan. Artist's name.

Never meddle in the affairs of a wizard unless you are soggy and hard to light!



Managing Editor of Flashing Swords

Visit my art gallery on art wanted
All my books in print

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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 4:01 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Gotcha! I see it now. Sorry Miguel. The underline threw me off.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 4:02 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Here is a rewrite. My first. I feel like part of the group now. (-:

Steve Goble’s ‘Zeerembuck’ reviewed by Dan Nelson.

One of the wonderful stories in the current issue of ‘Flashing Swords’ is sword and sorcery flipped. ‘Zeerembuk’ is written by Steve Goble and is a reprint from 'Clash of Steel 3: Demon' from Carnifex Press. The tale is told from the point of view of a summoned demon with something other than service on his mind. It seems the wizard made a mistake. What that means for the demon drives the tale as he strides off like a hero to action.
The writing is in a clean visual style with a touch of playfulness in the details; “The demon chewed and spat chain mail...” Descriptions like, “…with a snap and a great splash of water and muck” give clear images to move the story on.
I kept thinking I was reading a Ray Harryhausen movie as the demon is large with scales and attitude, but the story is not farcical or silly like a Monty Python sketch. Everything is distinct and very visual without being cartoon-like.
I read with a feeling of delight and ended the story feeling very satisfied. A very nice illustration by Miguel Santso accompanied the story. Go to http://flashingswords.sfreader.com/issues/issue9/fsi90009.htm and check out the adventure! A print version of the issue is also available.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 4:03 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
The indentation seems to have been lost.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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crystalwizard
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 4:09 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Much better.

Yes, the indentation got lost. For this forum, it would work better to put a space between paragraphs.

Okay, let's see how you do on a review of all of Issue 9. Don't post it here, however, email it to me as an attached .rtf or .doc file. email address is crystalwizard321@gmail.com

If I feel it's good enough, I'll post it.
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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 5:39 AM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
That may take me a while but I will give it a shot.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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Swashbuckler
One-man sword-and-sorcery machine



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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 2:48 PM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Go for it, Dan!

And thanks for the nice review. I appreciate it very much.

Steve Goble

Visit my blog, Swords Against Boredom, for news on published fiction and upcoming stories.

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Dan Nelson
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 8:25 PM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
The only thing I don't like is it means I have to read the stories before Lulu gets my print copy to me. I am about half way through and this is an excellent issue with no filler yet.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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von Darkmoor
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 8:28 PM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
"...with no filler yet." !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You were expecting some?!

~~~~~~~~~~
Jason M. Waltz
Assistant Managing Editor Flashing Swords Press
~~~~~~~~~~
Ever waltz with the Devil? Or devil with a Waltz?
Read von Darkmoor's thoughts to find out (and catch a review)
Gather at House von Darkmoor to give it a try (and discuss the arts)
~~~~~~~~~~
Critical Eye of the Dragon Avatar courtesy of crystalwizard

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crystalwizard
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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 8:40 PM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Dan Nelson said...
The only thing I don't like is it means I have to read the stories before Lulu gets my print copy to me. I am about half way through and this is an excellent issue with no filler yet.


Filler? I ran out of room! *(stares at pile of accepted stories)* I wish I'd had room for more.

Never meddle in the affairs of a wizard unless you are soggy and hard to light!



Managing Editor of Flashing Swords

Visit my art gallery on art wanted
All my books in print

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Dan Nelson
Hermit Troll



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  		   Posted 2/3/2008 10:22 PM (GMT -4)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Well, one man's filler is another man's masterpiece so I meant that I am liking them all so far.

Dan Nelson
King of Nothing and Emperor of Emptiness

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